The Grief Wave: When Grief Gets Hard

When grief gets hard, you don’t have to feel it alone.
Now seeing clients throughout California and nationwide (virtually).
The California Grief Center offers therapy, support groups, and Catharsis Theater experiences designed to help you move through what feels frozen—whether you’ve lost someone, lost your way, or carry unspoken sorrow.
Explore care, connection, and community at caligrief.com.

🧭 TL;DR | This Week at a Glance

✨ Profiles & Ideas
🗾 Sanae Takaichi — Japan’s first female prime minister takes power

💜 A Nation United for Safety — In partnership with survivors, advocates, and allies, DVAM 2025 calls us to solidarity, healing, and collective action

📰 News & Reminders
🌪️ Hurricane Melissa Devastates Jamaica as Category 5 Storm — Residents shelter, pray, and hold on through one of the most powerful storms ever to strike the Caribbean

The Bureaucrat Who Saved Lives — Dr. Frances Oldham Kelsey’s refusal to approve thalidomide sparked drug safety reforms and protected thousands from tragedy

🎉 Events & Gatherings

🔔 Nov 1 — Living Deeply Retreat with Elizabeth Stomp and Lulu Toselli
(Santa Monica & Virtual)

🌿 Nov 8 — Exploring Death Through Pottery with Annie Raysse
(Culver City)

🕯️ Nov 13 — Understanding Traumatic Grief Conference
(Lynnwood, WA + Virtual)

🙏 Nov 15 — Community Grief and Gratitude Ritual
(Santa Barbara)

🌅 Dec 3–8 — 2025 Ram Dass Legacy “Open Your Heart in Paradise” Retreat
(Napili Kai Beach Resort, Maui)

💔 The Traumatic Loss Companion Course — An online program for navigating sudden, unexpected, or traumatic loss
(Virtual | Self-Paced)

🌊 California Grief Center
Virtual grief counseling in CA and nationwide, support groups, Catharsis Theater, and companionship for every stage of loss.

💌 Dear friends of The Grief Wave,

When grief gets hard, it can feel like there’s no clear way forward. The mind resists, the body tightens, and even simple things start to feel impossible. These are the moments when grief asks for steadiness more than strength—for patience, honesty, and presence with what is.

This week’s stories explore what that looks like in real life: a country facing disaster and rebuilding piece by piece, advocates confronting violence with persistence, and artists using clay and conversation to face mortality directly. Each reminds us that growth often happens in tension, not comfort.

If things feel stuck or uncertain in your own process, take heart. Stagnation is part of movement. Clarity comes slowly, but it does come—often through connection, reflection, and staying in the work of being human.

Wishing you steadiness and perspective for the week ahead.

✨ Profiles & Ideas

💜 Sanae Takaichi

Japan’s first female prime minister takes power

Born in Nara to working-class parents, Sanae Takaichi rose from modest beginnings to become Japan’s first female prime minister. After studying at Kobe University and supporting herself through part-time jobs, she worked briefly in the U.S. Congress and later became a television presenter—a path that led her to Japan’s political stage. Elected to parliament in 1993, she joined the Liberal Democratic Party and served under the late Shinzo Abe, inheriting his conservative legacy and a vision of Japan rooted in strength, tradition, and security.

Her leadership reflects both continuity and contradiction. Takaichi is a hardline conservative who admires Margaret Thatcher, favors strict immigration controls, and upholds traditional gender roles—even as she breaks the highest glass ceiling in Japan’s history. Known for her blue suits, hawkish stance on China, and love of rock music and motorcycles, she blends severity with showmanship.

Now at the helm of one of the world’s most powerful economies, Takaichi stands as both symbol and paradox: a woman leading a party that rarely elevates women, a modernizer who champions old values, and a leader whose ascent marks a milestone for Japan—even as it raises new questions about what progress means.

💜 A Nation United for Safety

In partnership with survivors, advocates, and allies, DVAM 2025 calls us to solidarity, healing, and collective action

When silence is broken, solidarity becomes an act of love. Each October, communities across the United States gather their voices for Domestic Violence Awareness Month, first born in 1981 as a national Day of Unity. What began as a single call to connection has grown into a nationwide movement—one that uplifts survivor stories, teaches the signs of abuse, and urges leaders to listen, act, and change. Across shelters, classrooms, and town halls, people light the way toward safety and understanding, reminding us that awareness is only the beginning of ending abuse.

The 2025 theme, With Survivors, Always, honors the truth that safety is built in partnership, not pity. Advocates, loved ones, and political leaders join hands to raise a unified voice against violence and for hope. From the Hotline’s quiet phone calls to the roar of marches and social media campaigns, every act of care carries the same message: no one is alone. Each conversation, donation, and shared resource becomes a lifeline—a testament that healing, like awareness, grows stronger when we stand together.

If you’d like to join, visit thehotline.org and explore the 2025 social toolkit, webinars, and ways to get involved this October. Together, we can end domestic violence—with survivors, always. 💜

📰 News & Reminders

🌪️ Hurricane Melissa Devastates Jamaica as Category 5 Storm

As Hurricane Melissa makes landfall, residents shelter, pray, and hold on through one of the most powerful storms ever to strike the Caribbean

In 2025, Hurricane Melissa roared into Jamaica as a catastrophic Category 5 storm—the strongest in the island’s recorded history, with winds reaching 185 miles per hour. Floodwaters surged, roofs ripped away, and landslides cut through mountain roads as the hurricane carved a path toward Cuba.

Across the island, families huddled in darkness while emergency crews waited for the storm’s eye to pass. “Jamaica, this is not the time to be brave,” warned Deputy Chairman Desmond McKenzie, as Prime Minister Andrew Holness conceded, “No infrastructure can withstand a Category 5.” By nightfall, hospitals evacuated patients, volunteers fed thousands, and scientists called Melissa “a beast of a storm”—a reminder that in an era of warming seas, nature’s power is both relentless and deeply human.

💊 The Bureaucrat Who Saved Lives

Dr. Frances Oldham Kelsey’s refusal to approve thalidomide sparked drug safety reforms and protected thousands from tragedy

In 1960, inside a modest FDA office, Dr. Frances Oldham Kelsey faced pressure to approve a new sedative called thalidomide. The drug was marketed to pregnant people for morning sickness, but Kelsey wasn’t convinced it was safe. Each time the pharmaceutical company demanded approval, she refused, asking for more data—an insistence that quietly saved thousands of lives.

As birth defects linked to thalidomide surfaced across Europe, her caution became history. President John F. Kennedy later honored her with the nation’s highest civilian award, calling her judgment “exceptional.” Over a forty-five-year career, Kelsey reshaped drug regulation and embodied the power of one steadfast public servant to protect millions simply by saying no.

🎉 Events & Gatherings

🔔 Living Deeply Retreat with Elizabeth Stomp and Lulu Toselli

Santa Monica & Online (Hybrid) | Saturday, November 1, 2025

For over 20 years, InsightLA has welcomed people from all backgrounds into a community of mindfulness—spaces to pause, restore, and reconnect with the heart.

This fall, we gather at the Benedict Canyon Retreat House for a daylong Living Deeply Retreat with Elizabeth Stomp and Lulu Toselli. Rooted in mindfulness and compassion, the program offers guided meditation, movement, walking practice, and gentle silence in a peaceful natural setting.

Each retreat invites both newcomers and longtime practitioners, providing tools for steadiness, clarity, and care amidst life’s uncertainty.

💛 Registration open now. Saturday, Nov. 1, 2025, 10 a.m.–4 p.m. PT, Benedict Canyon.

🌿 Nov 8 — Exploring Death Through Pottery with Annie Raysse

Culver City | Saturday, November 8, 2025 | 1:00pm-5:00pm

For those drawn to the intersection of art and mortality, this intimate afternoon workshop offers a rare invitation to explore life’s impermanence through clay.

Led by potter and certified death doula Annie Raysse, participants will begin with a group dialogue on death, fear, and acceptance—considering how the awareness of mortality can deepen our connection to living. From this shared reflection, Annie will guide attendees in hand-building a coil vessel—an urn, vase, or jar—crafted with intention and care.

With only ten spots available, the experience is designed to be personal and contemplative, honoring each participant’s unique beliefs and journey. “I find the process [of handbuilding] to be more personal and the finished pieces to have a more organic and imperfect quality; a lot like life,” Annie shares.

💠 $185 members | $250 non-members
Saturday, November 8, 2025 | 1:00–5:00 p.m. | Members Only LA
Snack break 3:00–3:30 p.m. | Optional Glazing Workshop November 22, 1–3 p.m. ($50)

🕯️ Nov 13 — Understanding Traumatic Grief Conference

Lynnwood, WA + Virtual | Thursday, November 13, 2025 | 9:00am-5:00pm PST

For nearly three decades, Support 7 has walked alongside those navigating the aftermath of loss—creating spaces of understanding, compassion, and education for professionals and community members alike.

This November, they gather at Alderwood Community Church in Lynnwood for the 2025 Understanding Traumatic Grief Conference, a full-day event dedicated to exploring the impact of overdose and traumatic loss. Guided by experts including Dr. Ted Rynearson, Dr. Steve Juergens, Paula Becker, Dr. Barry Brown, and Jennifer Levin, PhD, the conference offers powerful conversations, shared stories, and integrative insights into how grief touches body, mind, and spirit.

All are welcome—survivors, therapists, chaplains, first responders, and community members—to learn, connect, and honor those affected by addiction and loss. Together, we’ll deepen our understanding of grief and strengthen the networks of care that help carry it.

💙 $65 in-person (includes lunch) | $35 virtual
Thursday, Nov. 13, 2025 | 9:00 a.m.–4:00 p.m. | Alderwood Community Church, Lynnwood, WA

🙏 Community Grief and Gratitude Ritual

Santa Barbara | Saturday, November 15, 2025 | 9:30am - 5pm PST

For over two decades, Wild Belonging has gathered communities to honor the sacred connection between grief, love, and belonging—a shared space to remember, release, and renew the heart.

This fall, we meet at Trinity Episcopal Church in Santa Barbara for a Community Grief and Gratitude Ritual, a full-day gathering guided by Alexis Slutzky, MA, MFT, Elisabeth Gonella, Kolmi Majumdar, and Rene Tonalli. Inspired by ancestral and earth-based traditions, the ritual invites us to express sorrow, sing, move, and be held in the beauty of togetherness.

Each ritual welcomes all—whether you come with fresh loss or quiet gratitude—offering a place to tend the heart, transform pain into care, and remember our shared humanity.

💛 Sliding-scale donation $40–$120. Saturday, Nov. 15, 2025 | 9:30 a.m.–5 p.m. PT | Trinity Episcopal Church, Santa Barbara.

🌅 2025 Ram Dass Legacy "Open Your Heart in Paradise" Maui Retreat

Napili Kai Beach Resort | December 3-8, 2025

Since 2008, the Ram Dass Legacy Retreat has been a sanctuary for seekers—a gathering to reflect, connect, and return to the heart.

As we approach December, we meet once more at the Napili Kai Beach Resort for Open Your Heart in Paradise, honoring Ram Dass’s vision with music, meditation, teachings, and community. This beloved retreat continues to welcome pilgrims, newcomers, and longtime friends alike on the spiritual path.

All are invited to join this immersive six-day experience of silence, song, practice, and celebration in Maui.

💛 Registration open now. Dec. 3–8, 2025, Napili Bay.

💔 The Traumatic Loss Companion Course (Virtual)

An online self-help program for individuals living with the aftermath of a sudden, unexpected or traumatic death of a loved one

Since its creation, the Traumatic Loss Companion Course has been a refuge for the grieving—a guided path through pain, chaos, and the search for meaning.

As you face the aftermath of a sudden, devastating death, you are invited to join this online program led by Dr. Jennifer Levin. With warmth and clarity, she offers video modules, guided practices, and community calls designed to support you through trauma and grief, step by step.

All are welcome to begin this self-paced journey of healing, understanding, and connection with others who truly understand.

💛 Enrollment open now. 12 modules online + monthly live calls.

🌊 Get Help from the California Grief Center

You do not have to grieve alone. Whether you have lost someone, lost your way, or carry unspoken sorrow, there is a place for you here.

Our Philosophy: We do not treat grief as a problem. We treat it as a passage.
Consultations are always free.

💛 With care,
Brian Stefan, LCSW
Founder & Clinical Director
California Grief Center

✅ P.S. Know someone quietly grieving?
👉 Forward this letter. You never know who needs it.
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